more about Addie's condition

well girls and boys I just returned from a long day in the city!  I went to our (on the center) church this am, then went with another missionary into the city for the day.  We ate lunch, conversed, ate icecream, sat by the sea, saw Addie in the hospital (update below) and then to an English Church....then out for something to nibble on again.  Smile emoticon  I can not tell you how good it feels to gather together in the middle of a large city that doesn't speak English with other people from all over the world that DO speak English and live and work or serve in this city for church....to worship and fellowship together.  Now most of you are saying...but don't you have lots of missionaries that you live with that speak English and are from all over the world.  Indeed we do.  There are about 35ish of us at the present and we represent 8 different countries.  The difference is we live together physically, have fellowship/community together, work together, eat together, breathe the same air together, rest together....basically we are together 24-7.  Sometimes it is just nice to sit and worship corporately and just completely and utterly be yourself completely vulnerable and open and not thinking about the person next to you.  I now have a new helper nurse wise in the BH on wkends so I am only doing every 3rd wkend.  I'm hoping to be able to go to this church more frequently to have "English church" and worship with a community that is slightly larger than the one I am with 24-7.  I think it might be very good for me. 
Anyway, on to my update on Addie and the real reason I'm posting...probably the REAL reason you're reading this at the present too.
I was glad I got to go see her in the hospital today.  I've only been to see her one time since she went in 2.5 wks ago.  That was 2 days after she entered.  I don't have a car or the ability to drive a ministry vehicle (as they are all manuals and I only drive automatic....he he).  So I haven't had the chance to go see her myself.  I've been reliant on the info the tias have been supplying us with.  Which I know isn't really good as they know nothing medically and the doctors don't really talk to them anyhow about the baby and their condition.  Immediately when I entered and saw her I was stunned.  She looks so pale and frail.  She really doesn't look good.  She's so uncomfortable and she doesn't even have a voice so she's crying all hoarse and it's pathetic.  Her little arms and legs are 3 shades darker black than her face.  they've done a patchy job at shaving her cute little curly head cause they can't keep an iv in her and they couldn't find anymore good spots so they had been searching for more veins in her head.  She just looks at you with these big pitiful round eyes that scream....help me.  The kind I hated when I was a nurse in the NICU that just seemed to say....."I hate this; life sucks; I don't want to do this; I'm miserable; can you just help me; I'd rather be sleeping forever and ever than fighting like this" kinda look.  I hate that kinda look.  She has this horrible cough that is persistent....she has so many thick secretions she's struggling to breathe and cry and it makes her feel yucky with a capital Y.  But they are too thick and yucky to cough up on her own....but noone is suctioning her out.  I wanted to go find some suction and just go to it for about 10 minutes and really clean her out.  It was time to eat when we were there so the tia tried to feed her and she'd take 2 sips then stop and pant for breath and try to cough up more secretions and then cry and then try again.  Heart wrenching.  She's still having diarrhea on and off and fevers pretty consistently.  I asked the tia about the oxygen and whether she had needed it or they had been giving it to her and her response was no...she doesn't need it cause she can drink her bottle well.  if that's well, then normal babies drink bottles supernaturally well (they must inhale it by osmosis or something).  it was really kinda gut wrenching cause I was just holding this tiny creature that looks really sick and I want to do so much for her but I can't physically do a darn thing for her.  And her caregiver isn't a medical person and is her first and last line of defense since the nurses do nothing for them.  They have NO clue how the kid is doing.  So there she sits a really uneducated tia that thinks this baby is all hunky dorey and tells me that Addie is "much better."  If that's a true statement...then I'm glad I didn't see her before cause they kid didn't stop coughing and crying and choking the entire 15 minutes I was there. 
The good news is she's still on powerful antibiotics (which didn't help for the first 10 days so I'm sure the longer she stays on them they're just wasted money, but whatever...no need to try a different one).  She's on a powerful antifungal that hopefully will kill the fungal infection racking her body (and yes she still has a visible yeast infection in her mouth) and she's been on TB meds since Friday.  So these are all good things...I just wish they'd give her some iron or something cause she really needs a blood transfusion but they don't do those here unless it's really life or death because of the risks the transfusion itself poses....but a little multivitamin with iron never hurt anyone....and I wish they'd give her some oxygen and suction her out.  But apparently that's asking for too much at this stage.  She'll probably be there for another 2 wks.  I pray she can make it another 2 wks.  This lung infection could kill her.  Please continue to stand with us and pray for Addie.  She's 4 months now and still the size of a newborn.  She's so tiny and frail.  I really just felt in my heart today that we needed to stand and intercede for her with everything we have.  I pray the TB meds kick in and that the anti-fungal meds work and that they find antibiotics that kill her pneumonia.  That she'll have a calm, no pain, and can breathe easier.  That her fever and diarrhea will cease.  That her tia taking care of her will be given strength and wisdom and know supernaturally when she needs to speak up about Addie's condition and tell the nurses something is wrong with her.  I pray for wisdom for the doctors and nurses that they will be given treatment plans and idea on how to help her.  I pray most of all that Addie would just be more comfortable and grow stronger and stronger each minute!!!  I'll keep updating you when I get new information, but please continue to pray with me!


Anonymous said...

Oh, dear God in heaven, wrap this precious angel in your arms and strenghten her frail body. Erin, keep updating us; we'll keep praying diligently for this tiny thing. I'm a foster mom for infants here in TN; I would just die for the opportunity to have her in one of our hospitals here. It's hard to read about her congestion and eating and breathing difficulties without the tears just pouring. I can't explain it, but my heart justs breaks for this little one I've never met. Keep us the wonderful, caring, nurturing work you do. May God continue to strenghten you daily for this sweet work!! Love and prayers, Suzanne Kroeker (FBC)

erin said...

Thank you a million times Suzanne for all the prayers for Addie. They do not go unheard by our Father. Praise the Lord for people like you who have heard her story and still have a tender heart. Don't worry...she makes me cry too!

Bless you for responding to the Lord's call on your life as a foster mom. It is such an amazing thing to do. I am often humbled by the Lord and the ways He blesses me with the things He has placed on my heart. For years I have longed to be a mother, to foster, and adopt one day. As I'm here...I am abundantly blessed to foster, adopt, and mother these tiny tikes for a season! My cup runneth over daily.

Keep the prayers coming!